it’d be cool to speak like 20 different languages & keep it a secret from everyone & then during a time of crisis, u could speak some fluent russian to some russian guy holding a gun to your head & all your friends will be like daaamn
(via obamallamatime)
baby-pigeon-in-the-trench-coat:
Fun party trick: put Skittles and M&M’s in the same bowl, wait for someone to grab a handful.
you can go fuck yourself
my mum did this and didnt tell anyone so when my sister put a bunch in her mouth she spat them out and started crying and now she has trust issues
(via obamallamatime)
I am borderline crying at how sassy this person is
ROLL BACK THE ATTITUDE
(Source: shitshilarious, via obamallamatime)
Yesterday a guy came up to me at work was like “How are you ever going to get a job with all those piercings?”
I’ll say that again.
A guy came up to me
at work
and asked “How are you ever going to get a job with all those piercings?”
(via obamallamatime)
i hate getting attached to people bc i literally never stop thinking about them
(via obamallamatime)
It’s mad depressing when u eat the last piece of candy but you didn’t look at the bag and realize it was the last one so you could truly appreciate it for what it was worth
(via hashedtag)
Pros to naming your future child “Yeehaw”:
- You get to have a kid named fucking Yeehaw
Cons:
- absolutely no drawbacks name your kid Yeehaw
also a pro: being able to angrily yell yeehaw at the top of your lungs in public places whenever your child misbehaves
(via foodismynigga)
really nothing nicer than someone saying “saw this and thought of you”
(Source: whatsyournewurl, via foodismynigga)
